Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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