He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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