What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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