Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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