I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize