did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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