Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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