Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
