how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Randomize
