I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
