i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize