I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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