Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
