My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
