fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize