and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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