That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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