your thong is hanging out like whoa
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
