As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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