He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just made out with a guy for $7.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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