Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
