i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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