I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize