Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
