I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
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