Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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