Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
