i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize