i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Randomize
