So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Randomize
