Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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