You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize