real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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