Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
