It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
