Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
