So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
