So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
