i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Randomize
