life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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