i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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