Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize