how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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