just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize