Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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