Rock
Scissors
Fuck
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
