I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
