no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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