come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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