i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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