It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Randomize