god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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