so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
